You have seen it. In fact, I
am certain I have done it. Maybe you have done it too or know a friend that has
been guilty of the act. It’s that thing when you profess someone as your other
half and sometimes even worse, your better
half. And it usually takes place on social media, typically in a caption under
a picture with the two of you smiling. It’s always happy, with a dash of mushy,
and sometimes, borderline over the top.
I committed the crime while I
was in my high school relationship. It was when I was young, naïve, and still
unsure of my own identity and self as a person. I didn’t know what I was doing.
But, does anyone really know what they are doing in that time in their life?
Once I got in the trenches of
the single life and started to learn the way of independence and self-love, I
became more aware of this term, “other half.” It rubbed me the wrong way. I
started to notice pictures of couples gushing about their significant others
and how they were their “other half.” The notion was becoming quite irritating.
When I was in a relationship again
after a long stint of being single, I began to realize that when I was thinking
about him, the “other half” phrase was trying hard to make its way through. As
if this was some kind of social norm. It wanted to be used as a descriptor for
him. I would push it off immediately and ask it, “Then what was I before? Was I
not complete as my single self?” Instead, I would think of him as a teammate or
a beautiful accessory that made my life even better.
As I am single again and
continue to learn more about relationships and myself, the “other half” phrase
gets that much more annoying. I refuse to think of myself as an incomplete
being right now. What a horrible idea. This phrase makes you think that we as
people can’t live and function without a counterpart of a person. I can tell
you right now, I am living, breathing, and loving all on my own. I’ve been
perfectly able to go on adventures, have fun, and be successful regardless of
having a partner right by my side.
However, when the “other” is
exchanged for “better,” I get a bit sickened. It makes me uneasy. It’s an
example of negative self-talk and possible low self-esteem. I am for the
relationship with someone that makes you and pushes you to be a better person.
Not someone you think is better than you. I think if I were in a relationship
and my boyfriend proclaimed me as his, “better half,” I wouldn’t like it. The
relationship doesn’t seem even and mutual. I would feel the pressure of being
the “good one.”
Yes, there are two people in
a relationship, but in this case, I don’t think two halves make a whole. I
believe two people make a team. I don’t want my peers to think that if they are
single, they aren’t complete and their life isn’t fabulous as is.
I think this phrase is one of
those things we don’t really take into account what we are even saying and what
it truly means. It is a saying that has been tied to relationships, romantic
stories, and lovey-dovey cards we give to each other. It is another concept in
which we don’t take the time to think about and what it does to others and
ourselves.
So, I encourage everyone to
drop this “other half” idea and start thinking about what your significant
other really is to you. We can be complete individuals and live complete
beautiful lives. It’s just an extra sparkle, an added bonus, or a beautiful
accessory that compliments you well when you have someone with you along for
the ride.
…
Sparkle&Shine.
Rachel
@theglitterylife
facebook.com/glitterandthegirlygirl