Searching: The Scary Parallels of Job Hunting and Dating, A Satire by Rachel Marshall

As a recent college graduate and early twenty-something, there is a lot of searching going on. The last few years, I have been searching for myself, the perfect major, and what I am good at it. Now I am searching for my first big-girl job. Oh, and I am also supposed to be searching for the right guy for me too. It’s exhausting. But, I am finding out the scary parallels between these two pretty pivotal life searches.

What people tell you…

Job Searching

Something will come up soon. You are great! A company would be thrilled to have you. You’re pretty. You’ll have no trouble finding a job. With your resume, you will find something in no time.

Dating

Someone will come along. You are great! A guy would be lucky to have you. You’re pretty. You’ll have no trouble finding a guy. With everything you’ve got going for you, you will find someone.

How are you still single? might as well turn into the new How are you still unemployed?

…

Technology

LinkedIn is like the Match.com of job searching.

I was on LinkedIn the other day when I saw that a company I had applied to a couple weeks ago had shared the job posting for the position I had applied for “an hour ago”. I felt awkward. It stung me, had me self-conscious, and in a way, bummed. Even my job searching social media hurt a little like when I see a guy I really liked upload a picture with his new girl on Facebook. Am I not good enough? You need to see other candidates first? Other girls? Can’t escape!

The same technological anxieties exist for both. The did my text message go through? can be the equivalent to did they get my application? Do we wait for them to contact us first?

…

The Big Debate

So, who wants to debate which is worse? Because you know, there is that weird idea some people have that being single is one of the most awful things in the world. I am currently both, single and unemployed. (Please, no pity parties.) I have been looking at both sides and so far this is what I have come up with.

I can’t snuggle with a job and it can’t kiss me either. I guess in some cases and depending on the job, I could maybe take it home with me. But in the job search, there is so much silence. I like conversation. I have to try to make my first impression with a cover letter and resume. They are so black and white. It makes it challenging to show my personality.

But I kind of need a job to live. I need it for the basics of you know, food, shelter, and other necessities. If I had a job, I could simply take myself out on dates if I wanted to.

This whole debate could be over if I simply found a rich man that sweeps me off my feet and the need for a job just vanishes. But I am not about that life. *insert sassy hand emoji*

...

Other Thoughts

Even rejection is similar these days. Some places don’t even bother to tell you they aren’t interested. It’s the same as the guy you had been seeing that stops texting you and eventually falls off the map without telling you a thing. Bye?

I guess finding a person/job is very similar because you have to like them and they have to like you too?

There are no articles on the Internet telling you how fabulous the unemployment life is and listing 25 reasons why. In fact, I went to Google and started typing in, “reasons why being” and Google started to try to finish my sentence with the first option as “reasons why being single is good.” See?

I continued to type the rest and once I started typing, “unemployed is,” Google had the options of “is bad, is a good thing, is depressing, is great.” I clicked on “great” to see what it would give me.

I selected the top article, “18 Good Reasons You are Still Unemployed” and I am still wondering why they bothered including the word, “good” in the title. Those tricksters. In short, the article pretty much suggested you are not doing enough, interview poorly, and maybe not doing it right. It also pointed out that you may be depressed, angry, or your attitude just stinks. But if you get over these things, you “will usually land in a hurry.” I am not kidding.

You can see for yourself, here.

I have close friends that are in the same boat as me living both single and unemployed. We are paddling hard and feeling like we are going against the water. But we should know that the sea of Life’s drift will keep us moving. And if we get knocked down or out of the boat, as Dory says, “just keep swimming, just keep swimming” or rather we shall say, “just keep searching, just keep searching.” Keep searching, keep talking, keep working. Ahoy!

Sparkle&Shine.

Rachel

@theglitterylife

P.S. Oh, but while I am here. I am a young, outgoing, and determined hard-working lady. I have a degree in Communication with an emphasis in Public Relations. I love writing, social media, and public speaking. My online portfolios can be accessed at clippings.me/rachelnm3 and clippings.me/thegirlygirl. I have a lot of experience. Want to see my resume? :) 

The Every BODY Battle

I am a touch overwhelmed. My mind is being cluttered over how I should feel about my body. Let me give you a glimpse as to what I am referring to. In the last couple weeks, social media has been on the defense over our bodies and what is the perfect body.

Victoria’s Secret just came out with their new Body by Victoria’s Secret bra with a campaign entitled, “The Perfect Body” with 10 of their tiny models lined up gracing the particular bras. As someone who emphasized in Public Relations in college, I can understand the play on words. It’s the perfect body (bra is what they are referring to because that is what that style has been called for quite some time), but with the models lined up behind the slogan, consumers easily took offense. They jumped to the idea that Victoria’s Secret is trying to tell us what the perfect body is, but really, it’s the bra they are talking about. So after a lot of backlash, Victoria’s Secret changed the ad online, by changing it to “A Body for Every Body.” The company has yet to comment on the controversy.

Calvin Klein has also received a lot of disapproval on the Internet with their new campaign, featuring model, Myla Dalbesio, who is a size 10. According to a Times article, Calvin Klein stated, “these images are intended to communicate that our new line is more inclusive and available in several silhouettes in an extensive range of sizes.” In the campaign, “plus-size” is never used and in an interview with Elle, Myla discussed how she was not treated any differently than the other models. She was happy to be included in the campaign and feels that she opened doors for other models that find themselves not in the category of size 2 models, but not big enough to be considered a plus-sized model. But with social media, people didn’t take the time to read her interview and check into the campaign, which in turn resulted to people claiming that Calvin Klein thinks size 10 is considered “plus size.” Not the case.

 

Now don’t let me fail to mention Kim Kardashian’s new cover for Paper magazine that will probably be forever part of culture. I’ve already seen that Dane Cook tweeted a “non-photoshopped” version as a joke among other spaces on the Internet poking fun at the image. Some might be outraged because she is a mom. I admit I rolled my eyes and thought, oh my god, really?, when I first saw the picture. But I also read an interesting article Cosmopolitan tweeted in defense of her that was rather interesting. Then the next day, we are now freaking out about her pictures with full on frontal nudity included in the Paper magazine article. An excerpt from Tina Fey’s book, Bossypants, about body image has been floating around in response to the whole thing as well.

In the November issue of Glamour, they conducted a survey over body image that was also conducted 30 years ago. There were some changes over the course of time, but when it comes down to it, it seems like we feel worse about our bodies. And the interesting correlation that is tied to this low self-esteem is social media. We are no longer as worried about measuring up to celebrities because we mostly have accepted the idea that they may have better resources such as a personal chef or a personal trainer. It’s easier for them to achieve amazing bodies. But what about our Facebook friends? We see our friend, Sally, looking really gorgeous in an Instragram pic and we start to wonder, well if she can look that good, why can’t I? With social media and the rise in pictures that we post, it’s becoming easier to start to compare ourselves to our peers, friends, old classmates, ex’s, etc. And I can admit I have felt this feeling before. What about you?

I am about exhausted just typing about this issue and I haven’t even touched on the fact that I am about to compete in a pageant in less than three weeks. One could imagine the prep work, trips to the gym, and changes in my diet that I have been enduring. My body has been a huge focus lately. I’ve already been asked if I am still eating. And seeing articles claiming these size 2 models are unhealthy makes me wonder if people will start to think I am unhealthy because now I own a couple size 2 pieces of clothing. My mind also can’t help but think back to an opinion article, my past editor in chief wrote about her struggles of being labeled, too skinny. Yes, even that's a thing! Read here: Small Fry, Large Fry

And I haven’t mentioned yet how it affects people in my own social circles. It seems like more and more, friends of mine have been posting a lot about their own body journeys whether they are changing their diets, working out, or going on cleanses. One friend of mine that works out at the same gym as me was told people think he is using steroids because there is no way he could bulk up that fast. Can we not give him credit that he may actually be working his butt off in the gym (I’m an eye witness!) and that he has been making proper changes to his diet? Why are we so quick to be so negative?

I am all about empowerment, loving yourself, and being the best you can be. But I am almost fed up with the hypersensitive society we have going on here. Calvin Klein never labeled Myla as a plus-sized model. Society has been demanding the fashion industry to use realistic models and Calvin Klein is taking that step, yet the media still jumped down their throats. I am almost wondering if Victoria’s Secret is starting to get annoyed with the demands they received and that’s why we still haven’t seen a comment from them. We are being bombarded with the offensive and defensive. Now I am almost feeling bad for the companies because they seem to never get it right anymore. 

I feel like I am standing here with a million messages and pictures swirling around me and I just want to scream: STOP! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT?!

What's going on here? People are singing freely to "All About That Bass" and Kim showed hers, but that's not cool. What's the balance here? What's it going to take for people to stop being so body sensitive? I'm tired of the criss-cross messages. I'm tired of being told one way and then the other. I'm tired of feeling self-conscious about my thoughts. My eyes looking back and forth, back and forth, to all these sides. Are you feeling cluttered too?

Sparkle&Shine.

A possibly too skinny, large chested, no butt, short, but it’s okay with me,

Rachel

@theglitterylife

#TheEveryBODYBattle

BBC News article - Victoria's Secret campaign

CNN Money article - Victoria's Secret campaign