Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Sparkle & Shine.



Sparkle & Shine.

I end every blog post with these two words. I remember deciding that I wanted to end my posts with those words as my open personal statement. Something original and created from me. Nothing like XOXO – or Until next time! or Love, Rachel. This was going to be my own signature. I wanted to use it every time and this would be my way of having consistency and something expected. As I am constantly changing and evolving, this would stay the same.

I remember only once being asked, “What does sparkle and shine mean?” Where did it come from? I remember in high school when I was going through this phase of cutting out motivational quotes and words and putting them into journals that I had. A friend and I had a collection going of things cut from magazines at one point. There was an ad for Secret deodorant and it had a phrase that deemed, “When you’re strong, you sparkle.” It was then; I fell in love with this little simple phrase. It wasn’t long after that when I had the word SPARKLE cut from a magazine that became taped to one of the mirrors in my bathroom in Kansas City.  Years later, it’s still taped there holding strong.

So I fell in love with the word sparkle. I don’t remember the light bulb moment or what made me think of it, but somehow, someway I came up “sparkle & shine.” It was probably from a cheesy poem I was trying to sketch. I love alliteration and I loved how it rolled off the tongue. Then somehow it became a part of me. It wasn’t long before I started to randomly receive little pictures and sayings like “Never let anyone dull your sparkle” and “Keep calm and sparkle on” on my Facebook wall, through tweets and text messages too. I still get them to this day and I love it each time. Even if it is one I’ve seen before. It reminds me that it’s still standing and still part of me. I was especially reminded on my birthday when I read comments left by people that incorporated the words into their birthday wishes. I’ve received a couple necklaces that say “sparkle and shine.” I even have slippers that say “sparkle” on the bottom of one and “shine” on the other.” My mom got me a shirt that says it and a floating frame with it too.

Sometimes I feel that I am still trying to figure out this even deeper meaning for it, but in the end, they are words that represent me and my identity. Something simple that makes people think of me or maybe even remember me. Sometimes I may have to think back at the very beginning with that phrase, “When you’re strong, you sparkle.” When you are strong and confident, you illuminate---you shine.

What’s your motto or your words? What do you identify with?

This is my 100th post. I can’t believe it. 100. My 100 goes to the words that have still remained over the years and become dear to me. Thank you to everyone that reads my blog. Whether it’s just one post, to some here or there, or all 100 of them. There are a lot of things going on. I have been doing a lot of writing and going through a lot of neat experiences that I can’t wait to share. So cool things to come! First, I started by changing up my layout. How do you like it? 
Here is to the next 100! Thank you everybody!

Sparkle & Shine.
Rachel


Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Let Me.

 One night, I think I just had this "let me" attitude. Just let me breathe. Let me write about him. Who cares? Let me walk. Let me do my thing. I started to write and eventually I was running with this fixed form and repetition. I decided to go with it and I actually like it.  Sometimes life gets overwhelming and I know I can find myself in this "let me" mindset. Let me write about anything. Let me chase my dreams, let me be human or simply let me be. This is my what I have so far. May do some revising. Because I seem to be enjoying that process now. Finally. So here you go, "Let Me."

Let Me

Let me breathe
fresh air.

Let me write
about him.

Let me walk
anywhere quietly.

Let me feel
and cry.

Let me love
without fear.

Let me fall
for you.

Let me chase
my dreams.

Let me see
the stars.

Let me touch
your face.

Let me hold
your hand.

Let me dance.
Let me dance.


Let me run
freely fast.

Let me cuddle
in blankets.

Let me smell
the flowers.

Let me smile
real big.

Let me capture 
this moment.

Let me laugh
so hard.

Let me scribble
blurred words.

Let me sketch
a poem.

Let me dance.
Let me dance.
Sparkle & Shine.
Rachel
@rachelnmsparkle

Feelings of Fiction

To all the girls that felt like they were led on or "played." When you fall for a guy that takes a step back without you. This one is for you.

Feelings of Fiction

It didn’t seem rehearsed
or like it was part of a script.
It didn’t seem systematic

or part of a scheme.
It didn’t look like a game plan
as if he strategized his every move.
It didn’t feel like some kind of perfected formula
or a recipe for disaster.
Maybe it was a chase; and I was to be conquered.
Or a competition and I was a prize to be won.
He didn’t look like an actor even if it felt like a movie.
He made it believable. Like he could go the distant.
I could have fallen for him, but his feelings were fiction.


Sparkle & Shine.
Rachel
@rachelnmsparkle

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Tangles

The church sign that I pass pretty much every day on my way to and from the campus said, "Let God Unravel The Tangles Of Your Life." This one stood out to me and I kept visualizing different things. I have been in sort of a funk in various areas of my life. And sometimes I can't help but feel some tangles in my life with everything that I am involved with and all the people I have been blessed with to have in my life as well. I wanted to write a poem in relation to that sign. So I welcome you to read, Tangles.

Tangles
I rolled around in mud.
I was covered in dirt.
I was hurt.
My body was bruised.
My heart was scraped.
God picked me up
and showered me with blessings.
He shampooed me with friends and family
and conditioned me with tough times.
He scrubbed though my worries.
There were bubbles filled with laughter.
He rinsed off the negativity.
I was wrapped up in a warm towel of faith.
My fears started to go away.
He had a wondrous brush.
One that gets all the knots out.
He ran it down my wavy hair--
brushed through my rough patches too.
But He made sure to be gentle with my tangles.

Photo taken in Emporia - November 4th
Sparkle & Shine.
Rachel
@rachlnmsparkle

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Midnight Madness

With it being Halloween, I had this poem in mind. I first sketched it a couple weekends ago randomly. It turned into something I really like. So have a good Halloween, a safe time and a fun night! Even under the stars in the midnight madness. :)


Midnight Madness

You can text me
and I’ll text you.
You can flirt
and I will too.
The stars are out
and I’ll play with you.
Will you play with me too?
Let’s explore something new
in this midnight madness.
We can talk about
anything and everything,
laugh until our stomachs hurt.
We can share our biggest dreams
and you can tell me your fears.
Let your fingers brush through my hair
and slide them down my waves.
Take in the silence like
how you want to take me in.
Touch my hand nervously
and I’ll gently touch yours.
Look me in the eyes and
make me want to kiss you.
But I’ll wait until you do.
I’ll wait until you do.
In this midnight madness
under the stars with you.


Sparkle & Shine.
Rachel

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Homecoming: The Fashion

When I was nominated for Homecoming Queen and looking over all the things I would have to dress up for because I was now a candidate and everything else with Blue Key, I knew I was going to have to get all my looks straight and really strategize.

I went shopping with some of my favorite ladies and Dillard's treated us well! I was able to get my formal gown and 2 other dresses. They had a really great clearance sale going on! 

This post is all about the fashion I got to have fun with during Homecoming week. It involved 5 different pairs of high heels, 3 dresses, and 1 fabulous pencil skirt and blazer I like to work!

A shoutout to Sammie & Anna for helping me get the look I wanted just right by letting me know what they thought looked good and what didn't work!

Tuesday - Meet-N-Greet
I decided to go with the pencil skirt and black closed toed heels for this. I love how my legs look when I wear heels and thought I'd highlight them for the Homecoming Royalty Meet-N-Greet if I were to be in front of students for hours. I love this outfit because I like the professional and dark look that gives it an edge. I always feel like a Kardashian in this outfit because they are always about the dark colors! Shoutout to T-Wash for the awesome black and bright pink outfit :)

Thursday - Hayes Lecture 
The day look...
During the day, I would be meeting with Gary and taking him to his leadership class workout. I wanted to look professional as I was escorting him around campus and representing Blue Key in the leadership class. I bought these fabulous closed pointy toe heels from Payless that Monday and I fell in love. My feet, not so much since I got some wounds from them wearing them for the first time! I like the cheetah print because it gives it a pop of my personality in a professional look.


The night look...
After the leadership class, I did a quick outfit change! This dress was the one I originally fell in love when I got my Calvin Klein dress last spring, but it was $150 which wasn't going to happen. Then I found it and in my size for just $20! Meant to be? I love how fun this is. It's so bright and a couple of my favorite colors! I paired it with my bright pink open toed heels to pop with the pink accent. I also loved the blocky navy blue dangly earrings to go with it. I also had a bracelet that had the blocky pink accent to go with the earrings. They were from Icing by Claire's. This was for an event that would include a fancy dinner with important people and then speaking in front of hundreds of students so I wanted something professional, but fun!

Friday - Blue Key Initiation & Reunion
The Blue Key initiation and reunion was another event that I needed to be professional and fancy for. I went with the black and off white dress. I put them with some strappy black heels with some rhinestone front straps. Loved how I felt in this dress. I liked the thinner straps in the back. Couldn't forget to wear my Blue Key pin with it too! Also, this dress demanded my hair down and curly :)



Saturday - Homecoming Parade & Football Game
It didn't take me too long to pick this dress. I loved that it didn't focus so much on my boobs. I also liked the elegant flow of it and that it was black. I also love the straps and back that are filled with jewels to give it that extra sparkle and "wow" factor to represent me. The little rhinestone touch below the bust was also a nice subtle touch. I needed to wear my hair up somehow to show off the straps and back of the dress. I went with a simple side ponytail. The earrings were beautiful layered rhinestone studs. I wanted to keep it clean and simple as not to distract from the beautiful dress!



Todd (my escort) wanted to match me and he coordinated well with all black and a black and gold bow tie to compliment it and stand out. It represented Emporia State well and made us look sharp together. :)

My nails were done with a gel color. It was OPI - Big Apple Red. I thought a bright classic red would go well with all the outfits. It would especially be a nice pop to formal black dress. :)

But I really think the crown was what completed the outfit on Saturday :) Beautiful and went so well with my dress! Thank you all for the love and support! :)

Sparkle & Shine,
Rachel 

@rachelnmsparkle 



Liebster Award


This is a nice change up for my normal blog post! Eden Tullis, a fellow Hornet and blogger, nominated me for the Liebster Award! Thank you for doing this :) Her blog can be found here --> Life Scribbler

And what is the Liebster Award? It's an award distributed by bloggers for blogs with under 200 followers. Supposedly, it started in Germany, as a way for readers and bloggers to discover new blogs to follow. It connects the blogging community and helps web surfers expand their horizons!
 
The Rules:
1. Choose 11 other up-and-coming bloggers and link to them in your Liebster post.
2. Answer the 11 questions the previous blogger set for you, then create 11 different ones for the bloggers you will choose.
3. Let those bloggers know you nominated them.
4. No tag backs. No mulligans. No puppy guarding. Okay, just don’t tag the person who nominated you.
5. Display the Liebster logo. 



Here are the questions that Eden posted for me to answer!

1. What makes you feel most alive?
Butterflies in my stomach
Laughing uncontrollably with friends
Going on a run

2. Favorite season and why?
I can never pick one! I love them all for different reasons.

3. Sweet or sour?
Sweet for sure!

4. What's your favorite meal to fix, and where did the recipe come from?
Chicken gumbo. It’s one of my favorite meals my mom makes and she gave me the recipe. It’s one of the very few meals I know how to make so far!

5. What are five things you are grateful for?
My family
My friends
Being able to go to college especially at ESU
Every opportunity I have been blessed with that has taught me things and helped me better myself
My ability and love for writing especially poetry which is something we may need more of

6. Would you rather read or write?
Write. I love writing and creating. It’s easier for me. I also don’t have much time to read and have a hard time getting into it when I can find little time. Sometimes bothers me!

7. When and how did you start blogging?
It was January 1, 2012 when I created my blog and made the first post. It was shortly after going through a tough breakup that I wanted to start a blog to document the new and exciting experiences I was to have. I wanted to write about things girls could relate to and I would eventually learn that boys have gotten things out of my writing as well which has been a neat feeling to have.

8. Who inspires you?
My family and friends. Also, celebrities that are artistic and creative that make an impact. Then the people that I may get to work on things with such as projects, events and more. Just about anyone can inspire me in some way even for the littlest thing.


9. Who is your favorite fictional character? (TV, movies, books)
The casts of Sex & The City, Friends, and Desperate Housewives. I especially like the Sex & The City and Desperate Housewives women because I love being able to relate to them in various ways and taking things from them that I can try to apply to my life. I love Carrie Bradshaw and her career in writing. To write about life like she does would be a dream job for me! I love how witty and strong these ladies are too J


10. If you had $100 to do anything with and it didn't have to go towards necessities, what would you do with it?
I really need some new tennis shoes. Wouldn’t mind some new clothes or a new watch. Also, I’ve wanted to get a case and sleeve for my Mac!

11. Favorite condiment.
Ketchup and mustard for sure. But I would like to note that I used to hate mayonnaise, but now I finally like it and have been putting it on sandwiches!

I don't know too many people with steady blogs, but I will choose to nominate this one cool chick I know named Fallon! :)


My questions:

1. Channing Tatum or Ryan Gosling?
2. What's your drink of choice?
3. Dream job?
4. Why did you start blogging?
5. What's you favorite part of blogging?
6. Cold or hot weather?
7. Favorite color?
8. Top 3 music artists?
9. What book would you recommend to a girly girl?
10. Favorite quote?
11. Favorite Taylor Swift song?

Happy blogging!
Sparkle & Shine,
Rachel

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

JG - Forever Golden

Rawr. Jake sometimes opened up text message conversations with me with that word. I've been sitting here trying to come up with a way to start this and I have been struggling. Thought that might be a good random way just like him.

I wanted to write about him. You know that's what I do and that's how I usually deal with things. I write. And he knew that. 

I first had class with Jake, the semester I had my heart broken. He was in the class that I would go to with red swollen eyes from crying because it was the class I had after my weekly counseling sessions. It wasn't until our Communication and Sports class with Dennis that I would start to talk and get to know him. We somehow started chatting on Facebook and after a few days finally broke down and asked for my number. We started to get to know each other and he was actually one of the first to kind of encourage me to go out one weekend. I had never been out in Emporia and finally my sophomore year, I remember Jake and I talking about it one Friday afternoon around class time. He said he would be out and I did run into him that night. 

Not many guys have been able to really shake me. Really get me feeling. Barely a handful have, but he was one of them. He was one of the very first guys to make me feel beautiful again. One that really got me out of my shell when I became single. I loved his wild nature which was why I always thought of him when Wild Ones by Flo Rida came on. 

We eventually had a falling out due to another girl and I wrote a poem about him. It was one of my first poems I wrote when I really got into writing poetry. When it became a way to express myself and capture moments. It's even one of the poems that has been posted on my blog. It's called "Those Hazel Eyes." After time, we found each other again. It seemed like we always did. I eventually showed him the poem and instead of being hurt or upset about it, he said it was good. That's how he was. 

I remember a lot of things.
I remember when he made a doodle on my leg of a couple stick figure guys. One had huge hair.
I remember running my finger over his JG tattoo on his arm when he was over watching a movie with me.
I remember my last night in Emporia before summer while I was out with a friend, he was having a hectic time at work and he came straight outside to me and kissed me in front of everyone without saying anything. 
And that same night telling my friend to make sure nothing happened to me over and over before we left.
I remember when he decided to walk me to work one day. 
When he helped put my things in my car before I left for the summer.
And when I grabbed his face and told him I liked his scruff. 
I remember.

He was a communication major and in the communication department at ESU, we are a family. I feel like I lost a family member in the communication department, a friend, a crush. 

I can't believe he is gone. Scrolling through the countless texts we had together makes me miss him and I wish I could text him now. But I am going to stay strong and positive because that is always he strived to do and what he would want me to do too.

I want to thank him for showing me to be carefree sometimes, let my hair down and be a goofball. He always said "good deal" and if you ever see me text that to you, know that I got it from him. I find myself texting it a lot these days even before all this happened. He wanted to motivate people and be a life coach. He wanted to inspire others and make an impact. And he certainly has. He made an impact on my life and my heart. Thank you for making me feel beautiful and the cool nerd you thought I was. Thank you for all the flirty fun conversations. Thank you for making me laugh and being yourself.

Sparkle & Shine,
The pretty lady, the nerd, "hun"
We always sent pictures to each other, just never took pics WITH each other! This is our only picture together.

As I was going through old conversations these were a couple of my favorites that make me smile :)