The Lead

Boys...it is an area of my life that I have been struggling with probably the most. It has been an emotional roller coaster ride the last few months with mostly downs. I got my heart broken badly and I have been continuing to try to open up to boys and my heart has already gotten some bruises and scrapes along the way. For some reason I refuse to give up and would rather not sit and dwell for a long time. I am starting to notice some common things among different boys. There were a couple weeks in December that I felt hurt and I was getting tired of it. I felt bitter. I wrote a poem and I had 3 boys in mind. I had 3 completely different types of relationships with them, but at the time, they all had some parallels among them. I noticed some similarities and it seemed like there was a theme going. I felt like I was wearing a sign that told boys to lead me on, hurt me, disappoint me while they were selfish and thought about themselves more. This has become one of my favorite poems and makes me feel like Taylor Swift more and more!

The Lead
I will be kind to flatter you so
And make sure to let you know
How adorable you are
And put warmth to your heart
Get it going and beating fast
You'll want this moment to last
I will lead you pretty far
When I seal it with a kiss
Under the stars.
But the cost for those butterflies
Will be a few days of pain
And a real good cry.
I really do like you
But I like me too.
I'll talk to you when there is no one else
And see you when it's convenient for myself
I hope you don't mind
That I need some time
To think
About me.
I'll leave you in the dark and up in the air
When you wait to see if I will be there.